I need a vacation from Stargate...

5 more down.  I’m getting pretty behind of other shows during this ordeal but I’ve managed to stay current on Eureka (Stan Lee & Will Wheaton in one episode!) and am getting ready to start the most recent episode of Torchwood after I finish writing here.

For those of you who aren’t watching Torchwood this season, you’re idiots.  This has definitely been the best season by far and looks to get even better; The episode title I’m getting ready to watch is “Escape to L.A.”.  Seriously, that’s an awesome title.  It has been a little weird since nearly all of it has taken place in the U.S., but I was a little shocked at the mainstream actors they were able to pull in to this season, mainly Bill Pullman and Mekhi Phifer.

Here’s what’s currently going on with SG-1 (start at the bottom if you want things to make sense):

Stargate SG-1
Season 3 – Episode 13
44mins
“The Devil You Know” – During an attempt to rescue Jacob Carter and his Tok’ra symbiote, Selmak, SG-1 and Martouf have been captured on the Hell-replica moon Netu by one of its denizens, who is determined to use their information to overthrow the Goa’uld system lord Sokar.
-          So Apophis is still alive (go figure) and is now plotting to kill Sokar and take over his stuffs.  Jacob/Selmak have intel that Sokar was 10 x’s stronger than the Tok’ra had originally thought and was weeks away from killing the Goa’uld System Lords and taking over.  A bunch of stuff happens, SG-1 and friends are eventually able to ring up to Teal’c in the cargo ship shortly before moon Netu (Hell) blows up, taking out Sokar’s orbiting ship where Apophis and Sokar were having a lovers spat.  SG-1 gets away safely and don’t worry, so does Apophis.  Apparently he was able to ring down to the actual planet shortly before the moon exploded and took out the ship.  Episode ends with him looking out over his new empire…  

Stargate SG-1
Season 3 – Episode 12
44mins
“Jolinar’s Memories” – The Tok’ra Martouf arrives at the SGC with troubling news: Maj. Samantha Carter’s father, Jacob, and his Tok’ra symbiote, Selmak, have been captured by the evil Goa’uld system lord Sokar.  Jacob/Selmak is imprisoned on a moon called Netu.
-          Carter discovers that Jolinar did the nasty with Sokar’s appointed ruler of Netu (Hell), Binar, in order to escape the planet some time before taking over Carter.  Carter thinks he helped her escape, but it turns out she used him to get free.  He starts to kill her but Nay-o-nak, Binar’s first prime, kills him with a staff weapon.  She’s returned to the pit with the rest of the crew, but not before remembering how Jolinar escaped.  She tells the team (SG-1 plus Martouf, Selmak/Jacob, and minus Teal’c) there’s a ring device in Binar’s quarters.  They then decide to break out, head to the ring device, and just as they’re about to ring to Teal’c in an orbiting cargo ship, Nay-a-nak busts in with guards.  He then  announces “You shall call me Nay-o-Nak no longer. From this day forth, I will reclaim my real name.” Then he removes his mask and says “Apophis!”.  Dun dun DUUUNNNN!!!!  To be continued… 

Stargate SG-1
Season 3 – Episode 11
44mins
“Past and Present” – SG-1 travels to a planet whose inhabitants seem to be suffering from mass retrograde amnesia.  They have no memory of their lives before the unknown even they call the “Vorlix,” and they report that their elders and children are missing.
-          Linea jacked up another world.  This time she loses her memories and gets younger along with the planets inhabitants.  Daniel and Kira (Linea’s name after she loses her memory) start to fall in love for some reason, especially since Sha’re just died in the last episode.  So much for mourning…  Kira creates a drug that will bring back everyone’s memories and takes it herself, even after learning that she was Linea, the destroyer of worlds.  The drug works, but Daniel convinces her to lose her memory again rather than kill herself for the atrocities that she remembers Linea causing.  Oh, and the semi-idiot detective from Monk (Randy) is in this episode as one of the main characters.
-   This episode is full of plot holes, most I can’t remember, but here are the 2 biggest: If she returns to the world where everyone has forgotten their memory and they all start taking a drug to get those memories back, won’t she be suspicious when they don’t let her take the drug?  Why didn’t Linea get even younger when she takes the drug to lose her memory for the 2^ndtime?    

Stargate SG-1
Season 3 – Episode 10
44mins
“Forever in a Day” – During a rescue of captured Abydonians, including his father-in-law, Kasuf, Dr. Daniel Jackson sees his long-lost wife, Sha’re, watching the activity from a nearby tent.  Sha’re is actually the Goa’uld Amaunet.
-          Sha’re has big teeth.   Oh, and she dies.  Teal’c kills her.  But it’s legit; she’s using a ribbon device on Daniel and about to kill him.  Daniel gets all pissy and quits because he was only on SG-1 to find Sha’re.  And he hates Teal’c now.  But Daniel has a number of dreams where Sha’re is alive and trying to tell him about the Harsisis (the one who holds the secrets of the Goa’uld) son she had with Apophis.  Turns out he experiences a few days while only a few real moments pass because while being attacked by the ribbon device, Sha’re passes him a message as to the whereabouts of the Harsisis boy.  I think it’s funny that Sha’re has been in a few episodes since the beginning of SG-1 and this is the first time she gets more than a few seconds of speaking lines.  This is the first time we see any of the team out in the real world too (Daniel’s house in this episode). 

Stargate SG-1
Season 3 – Episode 9
44mins
“Rules of Engagement” – Upon exiting the Stargate, SG-1 finds itself in the midst of battle.  A group of SG soldiers battles a Jaffa army.  Believing the soldiers to be the missing-in-action SG-11 team, Col. Jack O’Neill and the others provide assistance.
-          SG-1 is killed in the opening scene!!!  Ok, not really.  They’re shot with stun rounds by a bunch of kids running a camp for Apophis (they don’t know he “died”) to later be used to overrun the SGC.  The kids are fighting using Intars (non-lethal stun weapons that look like the MP5); we see these used later on Earth in a training exercise.  The warrier leader is injured by a live staff weapon, and SG-1 take the injured Jaffa leader back to the SGC by telling him they were taking him to Apophis.  They show him a video of Apophis dying, which convinces the kid to call off the whole war game thing.  They then travel back to the planet and show all the warriors the video.